Trifecta of Evil

Wow where to begin?

1. Dave, Heather and the Sunshine Killer'
Yesterday was the perfect day. My wife and I played 'ill' yesterday and took a day trip into Chicago, stopped by the Shedd aquarium, walked around and had a very wonderful (and first day off together in two years) day. Then we get home and there it was! The day-ruiner and devourer of happy thoughts, think of it as the 'Dementor' for us in muggle-land. So what could this object of pure hatred be?

A letter from the IRS saying I f****d up our 2007 takes and help me rectify the situation they would like an ungodly amount of money like tomorrow. (Okay, three weeks but still). Thank you IRS for ruining our first perfect day together. I'm going to call tomorrow and ask if they accept kidneys for payment rather than cash. (I'll give them the one filled with time-bomb stones I don't like it anyway.)

2. FREEZE SUCKA!!
Next on the list is my most favorite gaming system since the Super Nintendo: Xbox 360. Oh what wonderful games you have! Oh my are those exclusive titles like Mass Effect and Halo 3? Oh wait what... you have RRoD issues.. overheating.. loud fans and constant freezing? Oh.. umm.. maybe we should just, you know, be friends?

Well my system hasn't reached the dreaded Red Ring of Death yet but I'm getting a more substantial amount of random freezing while playing. I tried installing Star Ocean onto the hard drive but again (and at the *#*$@NG END OF THE GAME WITHOUT SAVE POINTS!!) it just freezes and poof I have to start again. This has only happened with a handful of games but I've never had this number of issues with a system since the first NES back in the 80's (and no blowing spit and PBJ particles into the cartridge never did help me either.) I've had 'Disc Read Errors' and now multiple freezing issues so I'm afraid I may be without an XBOX soon. *sigh*

3. Smoke monsters don't like the cold
Well this week also brought something of a first for us, the smoke monster visited our HVAC system and tried to take me out; Mr. Eko style. You think "turn HVAC from Heat to Cool and it should work right? Well ours decided to fill out upstairs bathroom with the most rancid, burnt chemical toxic plume of horrible you could even imagine. Suffice to say it is now on 'off' and will stay there for the time being.

Owning a home is a wonderful thing and at the same time the worst decision anyone can ever make. How is that possible you ask? Let's break down the basics of 'positives' and 'negatives' first.

Positives:
- You don't have to hear your 300lb neighbor upstairs wheezing through a session of the horizontal mambo as the bed frame cries out for help, only to conclude with a soul-crushing 'EEEEwwwrrrrrrrraaahhhh!" followed by uncomfortable silence anymore.

- Walking around in your underwear isn't just a risky option, it's a certified necessity.

- You can turn up your surround sound system while watching a movie without risking your life because you no longer have to fear a gun-toting drunkard who lives beneath you, who is one can away from a multile homicide rampage, making you the first of several killings that evening.

Negatives:
- Things fall apart and like to do so at the same time. I'm now convinced electronic devices can speak to one another and plan timed suicide attempts to drive us all into bankruptcy.

- You have to actually work on the place. Cut the grass? Spend $$$ for landscaping you will never even look at except for the 2 seconds it takes you to drive up to your garage and get out? Fix the roof? HVAC system spewing toxic fumes? Plumbing break? Sign me up!!

- Neighbors are still there and can be just as weird and annoying. Some like to do yard work shirtless (looking at you middle aged overweight guy), some like to leave their lawn at about 12in tall before cutting it and others leave animals out to whimper and cry throughout the evening.

So there you have it, my "Trifecta of Evil". I promise posts in the future won't have such an obvious dark humor and bitter sadness to them but the last three days have been rough and I felt like sharing. Hopefully you can laugh with, and at, me.

The worst first home video ever

This is the worst video I've ever made so I added a funky tune to make it a smidge above abysmal =)

Live Long and Prosper Baby! (minor spoilers)

JJ Abrams had a hellova task plopped in his lap. How can you reboot a classic genre defining series like Star Trek without alienating the die hard core, stay true to the thousands of novels and handful of movies while getting Trek haters on board for the ride? Simple, just toss every bit of Trek history out the hanger bay, strap on some shiny new underwear and start from scratch.

The best part of this had to be JJ watching the media and fans buzzing with fear about how he could pull this off. With the simple act of a time traveling bad guy destroying the future as we knew it Abrams was able to add suspense and a revitalized sense of the unknown that had been lost for years in this series because of all the spin off shows and movies. (Plus Shatner may be happy because he doesn’t suffer ‘death by metal walkway’ now)

I’m actually happy they chose relative unknowns (minus Simon Peg as a hilarious Scotty and Zackary Quinto who was raised from birth to become Spock) because you don’t get caught up in the Brad Pitt syndrome, or to put it another way, you don’t see the actor as the actor they become their characters and it is believable. I won’t name everyone you can go to IMDB for that but suffice to say the writers were able to portray each character and their motivations, personalities and flaws somehow within the first 45 minutes of the film. I still don’t know if I completely love Chris Pine as Kirk because while it is well known James T. was rebellious youth with a penchant for shenanigans but he is also the strategist and mastermind behind the fleet. I didn’t really get the feeling from this Kirk he would be able to outwit a Khan but rather would have rammed the ship into his skull and possibly killed everyone on board doing so. Another bonus was seeing a useful Uhura and not the woman we grew to know who just sat dazed in her communications chair with amazing lines such as, “Captain, they aren’t responding.” Chilling, I know.

Now for the ‘bad guy’ Nero is the classic villain with a one-dimensional back story. Nero is upset because Spock failed to stop a supernova (that wasn’t his or anyone else’s fault) which offed his wife and kid now vengeance with a side of Spock sauce is the special of the day blah blah blah honestly it doesn’t matter (or make much sense) because he isn’t as interesting and terrifying as the Borg nor is he as diabolically delicious as Kahn he is just what he is; a means to an end. I mean honestly Spock risks his neck to try and save your communist culture on Romulus and he fails so now you want to kill him? It isn’t like Spock created the supernova or made it worse, he freaking’ tried to help you and to pay him back you want to rid Vulcan and Earth of all its inhabitants? Totally plausible motivation.

With my minor gripes aside this was a very well made production with mostly great CG and effects (some of the aliens were not done very well such as spooky eyed doctor who helped birth Kirk). The action was fast and furious (without Vin Diesel thankfully), the characters were believable and it did something that hasn’t happened in over a decade; It made me excited for the next Star Trek adventure.